Were you reaching out to someone who listed requirements that you did not fit? Pick yourself back up and keep moving along because you never know who you will meet. A friend of mine was making plans to meet with an online match when he suddenly went MIA. Sometimes people drop off and pop back up again at a future time, and then you can be the one to do the rejecting.
A couple of days later, she saw his picture on Facebook under “people you may know.” She looked at his profile to discover he had a very current girlfriend. Don’t take the dating world too seriously, especially when it’s online and you just met someone new.
I hear men bitch that you have to be gorgeous or rich to get dates, and I hear women bitch that you have to be gorgeous or young to attract men. But, statistically, most of us aren’t gorgeous or rich, and we still manage to get dates.
Reasons for no initial attraction include crappy photos, poorly written profile, grammatical errors/typos, boring profile, negativity, or bad email technique.It also includes emailing the wrong people, either by emailing those whose criteria you don’t fit, or generally aiming out of your league in terms of attractiveness. If you’re able to get to the meet-and-greet, but your dates aren’t interested in seeing you again, you’re triggering basic attraction/interest, but then the real you didn’t trigger attraction the way the virtual you may have, or you did something to sabotage attraction. If you’re able to get beyond the meet-and-greet and go on a few dates, but then get rejected, see 3 above.Rejection is an unavoidable part of dating, and the sooner you learn to put it in perspective, the better.However, that article dealt with rejection in general, the kind of rejection that happens to every person who’s single and out there making an effort. What do you do when you keep getting rejected, when you can’t get a date, can’t make it past the first date or dates?Never get too invested in someone you’ve never seen in person and never heard speak. There’s a chance you committed a blunder that spooked your paramour. Online dating prospects are like buses, fortunately or unfortunately.
Try to take some ownership over why that may have happened. There are lots of places to blow it with online dating. There is always another one right around the corner.
People think it’s the not getting what you want that sucks. but it’s the 2nd thing, the NOT KNOWING, that eats people up. When we get rejected repeatedly but don’t know why, we assume the worst.
On some level, we assume we’re not attractive, not worth being with, or some other self-denigrating belief that makes us feel like shit.
I have also been the victim, the one left rejected, confused and staring at my screen wondering what happened.
Many times people I was interested in totally just dropped communication, even when I thought things were going fine. Am I disappointed that we seem to be breeding a dating culture of flakes? I do my best not to be that person, so here are some helpful tips to keep in mind if you’ve been rejected online: Those online matches probably don’t look nearly as good as their pictures or profiles suggest anyway.
The problem is you’re doing something to knock yourself out of the running, and you need to figure out what it is. Here are a few basic rejection principles to get you thinking. You either need to improve your physical appearance, or you need to work on leading with your masculine side (if male) or feminine side (if female). they didn’t ask you out again or didn’t say yes when you asked), whatever basic attraction that person felt extinguished, either due to something you did to sabotage it, or simply because it’s not a good match. If you manage to get through several dates before being rejected, you’ve either done something significant enough to sabotage attraction strong enough to warrant multiple dates, or there is a lack of compatibility that has lessened their attraction to you.